What else is possible? As we watch a war begin and feel the weight of the world on our hearts, it is easy to feel hopeless. Do you feel stuck? Confused? Sad? I know it seems appropriate to stay in that pain and worry, while so many people are suffering. We think that kindness is suffering with those who suffer.
Would you be willing to care so much, that you ask a question instead of matching their feelings? What else is possible? This question invites a different possibility, not only to you but to the world. While you watch the news, try asking what else is possible while you watch. When you hear your family upset or your friends feeling low, asking what else is possible? Is a gift beyond any solution you can imagine.
Questions create more possibilities! When you feel hopeless, what question can you ask? My favorite questions to ask my kids every day include: How does it get any better than this? What else is possible? And, how much fun can we have today?
Besides asking questions, another action you can take when you feel stuck or scared, is acknowledging what and who you love! If you love someone, do they know it? Is it time to connect with those you love? You can change someone’s entire day with a text, calling them out of the blue just to check in, or letting someone know you love them. If you love someone, tell them! đź’ž
What else is possible?
Who do you love and is it time to tell them? Are you keeping your love a secret? Have you decided that you need to stay hidden and your feelings are not going to be reciprocated, or are you scared of what’s going to happen if you were to be totally vulnerable?
Anywhere you are keeping your love a secret, are you hiding part of you? How much caring of yourself are you denying by avoiding your caring for something or someone? One thing I have discovered is that beyond any rhyme or reason, knowing what we love to do and who we love to love, is crucial to being happy. There is something undeniable about our desires, both of what we desire to do and be in the world, but also who we desire to be with in the world.
It’s amazing that our desires are simply beyond reasonable explanation. I don’t know why my husband desires me and I have no idea why I desire to talk about relationships on this podcast, but it seems that we come into this life with set desires. So, we might as well not hide from what we desire or avoid who we know we desire to be closer to! Can you really deny who and what you care about that and can you pretend that away? Or at some point, do you have to acknowledge it? Or admit your love?
And it’s not all about saying I love you, that’s not something everyone says of course, however you would like to express your caring for someone, have you chosen to share that with them? Or have you even acknowledged it to yourself? Are you hiding your caring and love from you? And what do you think you are protecting yourself from?
Whatever you think you are protecting yourself from, and wherever you don’t want to acknowledge what’s true for you, just for now, what if you start to take a look at that and what is the worst thing that could happen if you face what you know is true? You can ignore and you can choose not to have someone in your life or not be in theirs, but if you desire someone, not just romantically, it can be a desire to be closer to your mom, or a desire to be closer to a friend, what if you allowed yourself to have that desire?
And the only reason we don’t allow ourselves to have those desires is because we make ourselves wrong, or make pleasure wrong, or we have believed some lie that it doesn’t matter. And what if it does matter? And if you can at least acknowledge it yourself, what are your true desires and who do you love? Acknowledge is a magic tool and the reason I am going to focus on acknowledgement is because if you acknowledge something, you immediately invite more of it to show up in your life and into your future.
If you acknowledge someone, you are inviting them to be closer to you. If you like someone, acknowledge what you like about them, what is that sparks your interest? You might not end up with that exact person, but you might also attract people with similar qualities to your door.
We fall in and out of love with each other and have crushes and breakups and divorce and marriage boyfriend, girlfriends and dating, and pain… and sometimes we truly miss someone. (I still miss someone…) and acknowledge what you miss about them, their sense of humor, or the way they looked at you, or how great the kissing was… and again, watch everything you acknowledge show up again. You send your message out for the world to deliver those qualities right back to you.
And acknowledgement is an amazing tool in relationships, I think I talk about it in every podcast because it really has been a game changer for me. When I actually acknowledged the gifts to my husband, we became closer. You might be surprised how shocked and grateful your lover, other, partner might be when you acknowledge what you love about them. I thought I love you was enough and obviously he knows what a gift he is to me because where would I be without him, and you think it’s obvious.
Sometimes we are so close to each other that we don’t think we have to say what’s true, but how many times has someone shown their gratitude for you and you never saw it coming? And if you add gratitude to what you are acknowledging, especially in your relationship, get ready for paradise. Acknowledge every gift, every kindness, when they make you breakfast, or walk the dog, or they say something sweet or putting up with you!
That was something that dawned on me. I had to acknowledge that my husband puts up with me. For years, I had all of these opinions on marriage and him, and how hard it was and how wrong he was, for years… and then one day I realized, wait a second, what must it be like to be married to me? I almost don’t even want to know! I assume I don’t make it easy and am a pain in ass to be married to sometimes. But I also acknowledge the gift I am to my husband and how much his life changed when we fell in love and again when he became a dad… and a million times since then.
