If you begin to acknowledge what you are grateful for, you will always live in abundance of whatever and whoever brings you the greatest joy, happiness and wealth. Gratitude and acknowledgement together will bring everything you desire in ways that you cannot imagine and the most magical people and moments will show up again and again.
If you are in a relationship, do you acknowledge your partner? What about them are you grateful for? How do they contribute to your happiness? Are they caring? Where do they add to your life and have you ever told them that they are a gift? You might be like, taking your enjoyable other for granted, I always assumed my husband knew how much he changed and contributed to my life, until I saw how much it affected him when I said it out loud!
When you are grateful for someone and let them know, they begin to do or be more of whatever you are acknowledging about them! It’s like giving a plant water and sunshine, it grows! When you are grateful for money, it grows! If money is a problem, it goes! If you are stressed, stuck, scared, or anxious about anything in your life, including relationships, including money, start looking at it, say hello, that’s all acknowledgment has to be!, hello money, hello honey, hello sunshine, hello body, hello me…. And as you say hello, begin flowing the gratitude you have for that person, place or thing… again, like the sun flows light to to the earth, and maybe even say thank you…. And whatever is heavy or frustrating or stuck in your life, will start to relax, move, and even transform.
As you begin to notice things changing, KEEP ACKNOWLEDGING! And don’t forget to acknowledge what’s not working! Remember, you are free from judgment, acknowledging what’s not working isn’t wrong or bad, it’s just not working and then you can acknowledge what it would take for it to work for you. This can be very helpful in relationships. What one, five, ten things would have to change for your current situation or any future relationship to work for you?
Most of us are taught to work for our relationships, what if we instead have relationships that work for us? And, if you are going to ask this question, you have to trust that you know what works for you and trust that you will not go into those judgments of right or wrong, good or bad, they might come up because judgment is incessant, but do you trust yourself not to believe judgments and hold onto them? Do you believe every song you hear on the radio to be about you? Just change the channel when judgment comes up or let it go by. It can’t actually hurt you but you can suffer for it if you choose so it becomes real to you.
Circle back to gratitude, it’s so much yummier than being wrong!
To keep everything moving toward the life you desire, as you let go of the judgments of the past, the one and only thing you have to do is choose and choose again. And again. You can break up with boyfriends, you can break up with money, you can break up with judgment but you will never be able to break up with choice. Your life, your relationships, your happiness, your misery, your body, everything is your choice. EVERYTHING.
Pretending you have no choice is unfortunate. What an interesting word actually, unfortunate, you are letting go of the fortune you could have every time you say you don’t know or that you have no choice. Or one choice. It’s the opposite of acknowledgment so the opposite happens, instead of gaining everything, you lose everything. How much pain, sorrow, depression, and even disease is exacerbated because you have decided that something is happening to you and you have no real choice?
Have you ever realized what choices you do have available to you and felt completely relieved, empowered and inspired? So what might happen if you acknowledge you not only choose what shows up in your life, but that you have way more than one or two choices available to you. Your life and your love life is an ongoing choice of never ending possibilities! Which may make you feel overwhelmed because how do you begin choosing if you have infinite options? What will you choose?
This is where you can go back to questions, like the one I mentioned earlier, if you were not wrong and could never be right, what would you choose? And if you have listened to my podcast before, you know I am an advocate for following the pleasure and fun. You know, without a doubt what brings you pleasure and what doesn’t, right? You know what tastes good to you, what colors you like to wear, when you feel attracted to someone or turned on, you just know! If you are willing to take the first two steps, no judgment and yes acknowledgement, choosing is much easier!
I wonder who I might meet today? What would be the most fun? Who would be the most fun for me to flirt with? If anything was possible what would I choose? What questions can I ask today to create the future I desire? And then, choose something and see what happens. What information will your choices give you? And what possibilities will your choices create more of? The more you choose, the more you learn to trust what you know and the more fun you will have choosing again.
And then again. We can easily get stuck in comfort zones or stuck choosing in hopes of pleasing others. Those are choices we make too, and is the future love life you truly desire going to be found in comfort or judgment? Or on the edge of your seat, thrilling and undefined? We have freedom to choose, and choice allows us to be free! If you feel locked up in any area of your life, what is possible that you are one choice away from?
In relationships, we also often get stuck trying to make others happy and keep comfy. But we also seem to pretend we are not free to do what we like, or free to leave whenever we like. And then we blame our partners for needing us or not letting us be happy. We resent each other quite easily, and often wish others would just choose for us at the same time. How many of us spent the first half of our lives trying to match our parents’ points of views and understand their lies, and the rest of our lives resenting and avoiding our families?
If you would like to be free, acknowledge that you can ALWAYS choose to walk out the door or end any relationship/situations you know is going against your happiness or future. You will also find that often you will be required to choose for yourself, knowing that your family or friends, peers or whoever is going to be disappointed with you. Are you willing to go alone? If you are willing to go alone, you KNOW you can go no matter what, no matter who tries to stop you. A fabulous love life will require you to choose greater!
Now, we have talked about my first three steps to unf**k your love life, breaking up with judgment, acknowledging with gratitude, and choice. These steps will change everything. And, as you choose to trust yourself more, choose more, and be more of you, there is something you want to beware of that is already on its way to try and stop you from greatness!
Beware of the lies and very potent distractions that are emotions, including: fear, anger, rage, hate, shame, blame, guilt, doubt, etc… How easily do you give up all of your joy and inspirations to feel like shit for no real reason? I am not belittling how unbelievably painful anxiety and depression are, and I spent most of my life with ocd, add and daily anxiety attacks that I never spoke to anyone about until my husband, after we were married and I had to tell him because it got much worse and I couldn’t hide it. I remember how wrong and lost I felt, and I am beyond grateful for some of the tools I have discovered to completely let go of that anxiety.
The ocd and add are nothing to get rid of though and if you are different and have been diagnosed with anything you are feeling bad about, start asking: how does it get better than this?, and know that it can! You can message me if you would like more information about how I stopped having daily anxiety attacks without medication or years of psychological therapy. There are other possibilities and I just have to mention this because I know many people who have anxiety and for some of them, it’s only getting worse. And I know that shame and pain deeply, and I am here.
Don’t let anything or anyone stop you. You are here to love life and I am sure you have inspired so many people to have more joy in their lives. Try to let go of whatever mistakes in the past that might be haunting you and know that no matter what, you are not wrong. You are also allowed to desire who you desire, what you desire and choose toward your yummiest happiest freedom and future.
Nothing has to be fixed for you to choose greater and nothing has to be fu**ed in your love life!
